Thursday, 26 March 2009


April 986

Uggrash was annoyed. The woman from the Borders was seducing his fellows with sugary confections. This would not do. It had taken him years to learn how to boil a human into edible submission and now this human was stealing his thunder. He was the cook in this den, and he would remain the cook. Well, he would show them. The question was, how large would the pie have to be if he were to fit the weapons of all of the captured humans into it? How else could he smuggle their weapons into their cell so that they could make a break for it and get killed escaping? Yes, he really needed to fix them once and for all. Then he would regain his former status as clan cook. After all, he was old by goblin standards and toothless now. If he did not remain useful to his clansmen then they would throw him into the pot, and he did not want that.

The ugly old Goblin approached the cells carefully. He had made sure to lace the guards' evening drink with madroot, which would ensure they slept through the night. Perhaps they would be caught in the morning still asleep at their posts. Uggrash licked his lips in anticipation of the potential feast. The weapons in the roll on his back were heavy for one of his years. He had not been able to manage the armour too, but that was alright. He did not want the humans to survive the escape attempt. They were too delicious for that. He had reached the door of the cell and the guards were asleep as expected. Opening the door, he threw the roll with the weapons into the cell. It made a loud thump, which roused the sleeping prisoners. Groggily they sat up to work out what had just happened. Uggrash left the door ajar so that they could see the light through it. Stepping away from the door he was about to leave when he had a sudden thought. Turning back he quickly slit the guards' throats. Yes, he was taking no chances now. These two would definitely be for the pot tomorrow. Uggrash hurried away. Behind him he could hear a low conversation in the cell. He giggled to himself as he considered how everything would be alright now.

Of Cedric and Griselda

Time passed slowly in the Goblin King's dungeon. Brother Cedric, Brother Konrad and Griselda shared the same cramped cell. This had caused problems to begin with, especially in the toiletry department. Both Cedric and Konrad had been kept in all male company since an early age. Most Brethren are sent to the monastery/castles at the age of 6 to begin their martial and religious training. Griselda however was used to male company having been raised with six brothers. They soon relaxed into a monotonous routine.

They had been there about two months when that routine was broken. Instead of the usual shouting and grunting outside the door at meal time, they heard gurgling and thumps against the floor. The door then opened and a package was thrown in which clanked as it hit the floor. The door then remained ajar. Cedric walked to the package and opening it found his sword, Konrad’s Axe and an axe he could only imagine belonged to Griselda. They quickly gathered up their weapons and headed for the door.

Outside the door lay the two goblin guards, both with their throats slit. Quickly Brother Cedric and Griselda stooped to take the shields from the goblin's bodies. They then headed for the door to the next room. This they opened and Brother Cedric and Brother Konrad quickly stepped through.

Meanwhile outside the entrance of the goblin lair Herman the Spearman arrived with Brother Siegfried and Brother Wilfhelm. He had returned to the Brethren castle and recruited the two to help rescue his liege Brother Cedric. They entered the caverns and quickly made their way into the first cave. Here four goblins were waiting for any unwary guests, but the trio were anything but unwary. The goblin’s arrows bounced off their shields and in a few moments the goblins were dead or running. The crept onward into the goblin nest.

Deeper and deeper into the caves. It was quiet, too quiet, but nary a goblin did they see …

Both Brother Cedric and Brother Konrad let out a gasp as they entered the room. There, facing them, was a rather large ogre, as well as another goblin. Brother Konrad made short work of the goblin, but Brother Cedric was hard pressed by the ogre. Griselda rushed in to aid the brethren, but the ogre backhanded her and she crumpled to the ground. Both Brethren now attacked the ogre, but this seemed to have no effect. Twice it looked as if Brother Cedric was about to be killed, but each time he shrugged off the blow. Finally Brother Konrad got the break and the ogre crumpled to the ground.

As Brother Cedric lead the way Brother Konrad carried the injured Griselda. They heard a door open behind them and wheeled to face their opponents. The Goblin leader and two followers. The sight of the fallen ogre must have made them think twice for Brothers Cedric and Konrad made short work of them. Just as Brother Cedric pulled his blade from the black heart of the Goblin Leader, the door behind them burst open …

Through the caverns the trio rushed, would they be too late to get to save their Brothers and Griselda. Even in their haste, Brother Wilfhelm, the engineer, spotted and disarmed a trap. They could hear fighting up ahead and burst through the door only to see Brother Cedric dispatching the Goblin Leader.
Brother Siegfried rushed to Griselda and with his healing abilities soon had her on her feet again. They quickly found the rest of Cedric, Konrad and Griselda’s possessions, but little else in the caverns.

Mounting the horses that had been brought for them the party headed back towards the border ...

Uggrash looked at the carnage around him. Well, that could have gone better but at least he would not starve while waiting for the hunting parties to return. Hmm, and he had full run of the lair. There only remained women and children at the moment. That was a bonus. As the only adult male, he was in charge now too. Maybe it was not all that bad after all.

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